Twice a year, November and June is the Melbourne Mind Body Spirit festival held at the Exhibition centre. The MBS has been something I have been visiting each time since I first moved to Melbourne more than two years ago. It’s a place that I feel re-connected to my past.
When I first moved to Hong Kong 6 years ago, I found a little shop called the New Age Shop where I used to frequent. Later I worked there for a year. The shop brings healers, readers etc from all over the world to work for two weeks at a time in the shop. Twice a year for the last 20 years it has been bringing Krystyna, Karim and their aura photo camera.
An aura camera is a bio-feedback imaging system which scans the energy of the hand and passes that information to a computer program which creates the colours around a persons image on professional instant film.
Karim and his partner Krystyna are my link between my 4 years of deep spiritual exploration in Hong Kong, and my current grounded practical life in Melbourne. I knew them then, and I know them now as they visit each MBS fair in Melbourne.
Krystyna took my photo today. I was smiling as I excitedly told her the past 6 months of news and happenings, while trying to hold still for the camera. I had been looking so forward to having my photo taken today. I have had several over the past 6 years, but this one was by and far the most beautiful. Unfortunately my partner is out filming auditions for his latest film with the nice camera, so below you can see a photo of my aura photo, taken from my dodgy HTC camera. Sorry HTC, but you just don’t give this photo the true brilliance it deserves.
I’m all happy, smiley, sun-shiney yellow and orange. And when I was told the meaning of my colours, I was so happy. Before me was a physical representation of all that I have been working towards, all my efforts, and hard work. It really highlighted for me how everything up until now has been leading up to this very moment.
The meaning of yellow:
Yellow is the colour of the intellect. Yellow also shows an affinity to variety and happiness. Its represents a cheerful, intellectual and humorous person. A lady helping Krystyna told me that she can see in the photo that my mind has been very active, and that I have been sharing much of my mental activity with the world. She also noticed how truly happy and content I am with my life and how positively I feel about my future.
The meaning of Orange:
Orange is the colour that relates to ambition, drive and lateral thought, where self expression is important. Orange is ambitious, expressive and dynamic. It is creative and full of new ideas. The lady told me that the positioning of the orange also signifies that I have recently just achieved some goals I have been striving towards, and am now in the process of creating new ones. I’m a very determined person who doesn’t walk away from what I want. She is very right about that. This morning before we went, I decided I definitely want to write a fiction novel in the future, and I will.
Why these colours made me so happy:
As a child, I dreamed of becoming a writer someday. But then stuff got in the way, school mostly, and a mom who pushed me to excel when I didn’t really want to.
One of my proudest childhood moments was when my Grade 3 teacher read a story I wrote about a Bubblegum Tree to the whole class. Of all the stories she received, it was mine that she read.
But as I got older, the writing I did was for school, essays, projects, term papers, exams, you name it, I wrote it, and I hated it. I actually failed first year English in University. The topics were boring, the literature drab, and I didn’t like writing arguments. After 4 years of University, I hated writing with a vengeance.
I first learned that I had a creative writing ability when I lived in Japan (in my mind, Grade 3 didn’t count). I lived in a more rural area outside of Tokyo and found I was pretty much immersed in a Japanese speaking environment everyday, and I really only got to speak proper English once a week when I met a couple of North American friends in Tokyo. A lady in Tokyo was offering a creative writing course for expats and I jumped at the opportunity, mostly because I felt like I was loosing my English mind. But when the course ended, so did my writing, and my job. I packed my bags, moved to Hong Kong, and never touched a pen again for a very long time.
Since the Tokyo writing course I have wanted to write, but for years I didn’t write. Then one day earlier this year, April I believe, I didn’t just want to write anymore, I needed to write. And that need felt like it came from within the very depths of my soul and it came with a burning fiery determination. The only problem was, I couldn’t write. I spent months determined to write. I tried everything I could think of such as, spending time in the forest with a notebook, bringing the laptop into different rooms, doing some meditations, and spending countless hours on Skype with my best friend in Hong Kong trying to figure out why I had writers block extreme and how to fix it. The more I tried to write, the more I couldn’t, and the more I couldn’t the more frustrated I became, until one day, I almost threw the computer off the bed. I remember I sat in my bedroom for hours that night fuming. The door was closed, and my partner stayed in the safe confines of his office until I was asleep (smart man!). I was ready to light up writing that night and toss it into the bin forever with a big explosion of my temper. I was that mad at myself for being so useless and unable to do something as simple as writing (see what I mean about the fire?).
But then I found a blog for those with writers block (it’s called Aliventures), and from it I found some tips and alot of hope. I also stopped working overtime at work and my stress levels started lifting. From it emerged the occasional poem, several half finished stories, alot of rambling, and then finally after 6 months of putting myself through self-induced hell, writing started flowing. It came with plenty of struggles at first but eventually it started to flow. And to the flow I give credit to blogs with writing prompts, such as Six Word Saturday where this post is going as soon as it’s done. Finally, I had achieved what I had wanted so badly, to become a writer, to be able to write all the time, anytime, anything. To push my own boundaries, challenge my ability, surprise myself with the finding of tucked away forgotten little packets of creative brilliance, and to prepare myself for what’s next.
Writing has brought a lightness and joy to my life in a way that nothing else has. It has become something very precious, special, and I love getting lost in my own imagination. Others around me have noticed how much happier I have been lately. And now I own that happiness in the form of a physical representation of my aura in an aura photograph.
So where to from here? Where is this writing taking me? Where does it want to go? I’m pretty determined to find out, so I’m pretty sure I will know soon enough, and hopefully have alot of fun in the process 🙂
Written for 6 Word Saturdays at Show My Face. “Describe your life in 6 words” Click on the Linkey to see what others have wrote.